Whether you and your spouse have only been married for a couple years or if you two have aged 20 years or more since your wedding day, you would likely agree with most Minnesota spouses who say marriage can be both rewarding and challenging at the same time. Perhaps your bad times started to outweigh your good times at some point, and that is why you have decided to divorce. If your situation was prompted by a particular issue, such as infidelity, you are definitely not alone in your struggle.

Many marriages end because of this issue. While every relationship is unique, spouses often relate to other couples regarding underlying factors that may have caused one or both spouses to cheat. Not every marriage winds up in divorce court over infidelity; however, when this is a central issue in an unsustainable relationship, there is often a lot of emotional turmoil involved. A strong web of support comprised of family, close friends and legal advocates can provide encouragement and assistance as needed.

Were one or more of these issues a factor in your marriage?

Infidelity often develops out of one-sided relationships. If one person feels neglected or as though he or she is pulling all the weight in the marriage, it can cause dissatisfaction, loneliness and resentment. The following list includes reasons many spouses later say had something to do with why they cheated:

  • Boredom: Especially concerning marital intimacy, many people say they grew bored in their relationships at home and were attracted by the mystery and excitement of an illicit affair. 
  • Unequal amounts of desire: If you and your spouse are not like-minded when it comes to how often you desire intimacy in your marriage, it can lead to problems in all aspects of your life together. This is often a causal factor toward infidelity.
  • Emotional neglect: Not every affair starts because of physical attractions. Many people first cheat emotionally before they actually engage in physical romance — a possible consequence of lack of companionship or communication in a marriage. 
  • Revenge: A spouse may intentionally seek out an extramarital relationship to get back at the other spouse for a past affair. 

One or more of these issues may be connected to the problems that led to your own marriage decline, or your situation may be entirely different. Regardless of what may have caused the affair that led you to divorce, one of the most important issues from this point onward most likely concerns all the legal issues you’ll need to resolve to achieve a fair and agreeable settlement.

Don’t let emotions cloud your thinking

It’s understandable that your feelings may be deeply hurt or that you may have trouble thinking beyond the issues that caused your marriage to fall apart. However, if you want to protect your rights and assets and also make sure that your children’s interests are a central focus of all proceedings, an experienced attorney’s support could prove invaluable toward moving on to a brighter future.